anger as a tool
looking at causes
behind every angry person there is pain
When anger is an issue too often mainstream psychology looks to manage it rather than eradicate it. I have had many experiences with self devlopment students and casual clients showing that it most certainly can be removed as a part of ones emotional habit. Anger presents itself in many ways not all of them aggressive, depression is a form of anger as is resentment. Having some level of anger in your llife is normal, don’t let anyone tell you different or make you feel less of a person because of it. It should never hold a regular or ongoing position in your life, and nor should it be so terrible that others physically or emotionally suffer at your hands.
There are many reasons why a person will be angry, abuse, negligence, suffering willful harm, fearing losses, and quite simply not being taught differently by parents. The single biggest cause of anger in a situation where you are not in control would be mimicking your parents style. I learned long ago that those who say,”I don’t want to be like my Mother/Father.”, usually already are. Verbalizing something you don’t want in your life is an indicator of your present not your future tendencies, this makes a good barometer for self monitoring. I would have to say that learned behaviour once recognized is very easy to deal with, as anger is not the issue but a lack of knowing a better way to handle things.
Feeling justified in one’s anger because of how one was mistreated at some point is a little trickier, firstly there needs to be some acknlowedgement that your anger is having a detrimental affect on others, most likely your family, children and friends. And then some work done to work through the painful memories so that we can establish a new emotional foundation. Self devlopment classes are ideal for this, identifying what you experienced and then changing your perspective are key elements in making significant and rapid progress to behaviour changes.
Anger can turn people against you, usually those whose help you need. Client X came to me with anger issues, she had an ongoing fight with her non new zealand husband, as he was seeking custody of their daughter and he lived overseas. In her anger she filed a number of erroneous complaints against him, distanced herself from her mother and generally left herself without support. Her friends found it hard to be around her as all her conversations would turn to this issue with her ex and her anger would become palable during conversation, after a few years they found it too much of a strain on the friendship. The question to ask in this situation and any like it is, does your anger help your situation or hinder it? My feeling here was that she was scared that if she did not hold her anger things would get out of her control and she would lose everything, so she held her anger as a tool to try to maintain control. Where anger is not serving you, through marriage break ups and other emotionally challenging situations it is time to get help to step back and gain an understanding of the best ways to get through as best you can without destroying your self and your relationships on the way. If this is you, ask about my grief therapy program, grief can settle in childhood or by circumstances later in life, maybe it’s time for you to get happy
Grief as a root cause for anger is understandable, there is a point though where you should come past the grief of a situation and move on, healing is something that should have a limited time frame so that you can move on into your future happy and healthy. When you take that anger with you, regardless as to whether it is justified or not, people will sympathise, but ultimately treat you in a way that reflects your behaivour. Regressive therapies are great for dealing with long held grief and you can easily find yourself living a whole new way of being. If this is you trying my 360 degree program would be of benefit. Turning your life around is often simply a matter of the right kind of therapy and support.
Depression is anger turned inward, this can be due to a lack of ability to appreciate life in general or due to living in a non real state. having an ideal of perfection for yourself and others will inevitably lead to feeling let down no matter how hard others try to make you feel good. Very successful people are just as likely to suffer depression as those who feel like failures, this is due to expectations, if you expect a achievement to bring happiness, then you did not bring happiness to your achievement. A change in perspective is the only way to come past depression. Depression cannot be turned off as such, you would need to learn how to see reality and love it. Hypnotherapy and associated TnT solutions can have you up and running full throttle in a relatively short period of time. Oh and Tnt? that is where i light a bomb under your ass…
Anger and diet, resentful people are more likely to smoke, overeat, become addicts and alcoholics than any other group. Angry teens are at risk teens because of the likely choices they will make to avoid their feelings. unfortunately it never works and those who choose these methods only find themselves alienated and miserable. One of the fallouts to getting angry with others is being angry with yourself when you are not happy with your behaviours. life support strategies are my speciality, looking for permanent solutions that take only months to be effective, using the skills of hypnotherapy, energy therapy, trigger point therapy and Tnt. Give it a go, you may find the very thing you have been looking for to transform your life.
You don’t have to live with anger in your life, you don’t have to live with another person who has anger issues, you can always find the right support and method to help you be the person that reflects the inner you.
heal your body